Before the Storm
by LadeeBear
Summary: Standing out in the rain, knowing it's really over. Please don't leave me alone. Chad/Sonny one-shot songfic.


**Hey everyone – guess who is back for a (long) one-shot? Yes, the correct answer is me. Now, before we begin, I would just like to inform you that this does not end with a happily-ever-after. I say that because I am such a fluffy by nature, but I have been told that I am a great angst writer. And, without fail, with every angsty one-shot I write, I always have someone who demands that I write a happy chapter after it...but this one is going to remain a one-shot. Sorry! I will write happy things to come, never fear, but I had to get this song out of my system since it has been just begging me to write a songfic to it! I sincerely hope you all enjoy this, and don't let the angst stop you from reading and reviewing!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own SWAC, its characters, or the lyrics to this song. I didn't have much time to edit thoroughly, so any mistakes you may see are mine as well. I apologize!**

**Spoilers: None, really.**

* * *

Before the Storm

_I know this isn't what I wanted  
I never thought it'd come this far  
Just thinking back to where we started  
And how we lost all that we are._

The storm clouds were – literally and figuratively – gathering outside of Sonny Monroe's bedroom window as the teenager sighed and folded another one of her blouses into the plaid suitcase lying on her bed. Flickering her chocolate eyes around the room, the young woman surveyed the neatly stacked articles of clothing and tightly boxed knickknacks with sorrow. A quick knock on the door startled Sonny away from her thoughts momentarily.

"Come in," the brunette exclaimed.

Connie Monroe opened the door slightly and peeked in with a compassionate expression etched onto her face. "How are you doing, sweetie? Need any help with packing?"

Sonny shook her head as she delicately placed a scarf atop her blouse and zipped up the suitcase. "That's the last of it, actually."

"Wow," her mother said, opening the door just far enough so that she could step foot inside. Connie's eyes met her daughter's own. "It's crazy to think of how much stuff we really have."

"You never know how much stuff you own until you try to cram it all into boxes and suitcases."

A motherly wave of emotion wafted over Connie as she walked toward her only child. The woman squeezed Sonny's shoulders before drawing her into an embrace. The little girl inside of Sonny clung to her mother's shirt and buried her face into the comforting shoulder. Connie stroked the teenager's hair lightly. "I know it's going to be difficult, but you've made the best of everything that has happened so far. We'll be alright," she assured.

Sonny broke away from her mother and sunk onto her bed. "I just can't believe it's all over, Mom. It feels like just yesterday we moved here and now…"

"But, honey, we're going back home."

The mention of 'home' seemed to strike Sonny's tear duct, and water began to well up behind her eyes. Wisconsin had once been all she had ever known and wanted to know, for that matter. When Marshall had offered her a job at _So Random!_ Sonny should have known that it wouldn't last forever – her contract was only for three years. She should have remembered that Los Angeles was only a temporary, fleeting fantasy. Her home was truly in the state with all of the cows and cheese.

Connie patted her daughter's shoulder. "We can swing by the set before we head out if you want to."

"There won't be much to see," Sonny replied sadly. It was widely known that shows produced at Condor Studios lasted, on average, about two seasons. _Mackenzie Falls _and _So Random! _had been the last two – and longest running – shows to end, wrapping up three seasons each. Sonny knew that it was time to let go. But something was stopping her from being able to do so. And she knew exactly what it was.

Or rather, exactly _who _it was._  
_

_We were young and times were easy  
But I could see it's not the same  
I'm standing here but you don't see me  
I'd give it all for that to change._

The Sonny Monroe who arrived from Wisconsin was a vastly different person than the one who currently was helping her mother load suitcases and boxes into their minivan. When the perky young brunette had first arrived, she had been a star struck, easily frazzled, and somewhat naïve girl. Los Angeles had changed her into a sophisticated, confident young woman who wasn't afraid to speak her mind or stand out in a crowd.

Sonny slammed the trunk of the van closed and walked back inside of her apartment to retrieve more boxed memories of her last few years. As her mom unlocked the front door, she noticed the chipping paint covering up deep, black scuff marks. She smiled and recalled the night that everyone had gotten sick on bad sandwiches. It was the same night that Chad had heroically kicked down her door.

Her stomach twisted at the thought of the drama star. Over the past few years, he had made it quite clear to Sonny that he cared about her as a friend, and possibly more. There had been playful bantering, flirtatious arguments, and almost-kisses. It was amusing, for the first year or so, to have someone who made your blood boil one moment and swoon the next. But it was also exhausting – it was a tiresome game that had to end, either happily or in flames, at some point in time.

As Sonny picked up one of her bags, something fell out of the unzipped front pocket. She knelt down to pick it up and examined the photo with a smile. It was the signed headshot that Chad had given to her on the day they first met. She remembered how obnoxious he was and yet how sweet he had managed to be months later when he delivered a sincere apology autographed onto another picture. Chad had been, and would always remain, so complex to her.

Years ago, they were carefree kids. She was an adult now, and so was he. They had to face reality, no matter how ugly it was. The reality, she determined, was that they could never be. It wasn't because she didn't care about him. She did. It was simply because they were too different. He was, to her, the epitome of the fantasy worldview. She knew that he wasn't a stable constant in her life, and could never be. He belonged in L.A. in the fast-paced world of adventure, fleeting moments, and impulsive decisions. She belonged in the stable world of Wisconsin where she could go to college, meet a guy from a nuclear family, and eventually marry in the old church on the hill with all of her family and neighbors in attendance.

Visions of farm-town weddings and expensive nights on the L.A. strip just didn't fit together. They never would.

_I don't want to lose her  
Don't wanna let her go_.

Chad Dylan Cooper stared at the near-empty set of his former television show, _Mackenzie Falls_ with tinges of genuine sorrow marked in his eyes. For three years, that set had been his home, and he had been its star. Now, he realized with a sunken heart, the object of his boasting contained nothing more than a few left-behind potted plants and scattered crumbs from snacks. _Mackenzie Falls_ was really over.

The blonde actor shoved his hands into his pockets and, with a final glance at the empty stage two lot, walked toward the door. As the teenager meandered through the hallways, he contemplated his past few years at Condor Studios. Out of those three years there had only been one person who he would truly miss – Sonny.

Until Sonny had arrived with her bubbly personality and optimistic attitude about life, Chad had been a self-absorbed young star, willing to go to any lengths to maintain his popularity. "You're my moral conscience now," he would tell her later on. "You make me want to be Chad, not Chad Dylan Cooper twenty-four seven."

And indeed, she had made him better. That wasn't to say that he hadn't relapsed here and there, reverting back to his old self-centered ways. Because he had. Unlike before, when this occurred, he felt something in the pit of his stomach, gnawing at the lining – regret, remorse, and guilt. She liked him most when he was genuine with her, when he apologized and wasn't cocky about it. He liked himself best that way too.

Chad paused and realized that he had unconsciously ended up at the entrance of the _So Random!_ prop house. Peering inside of the door, he sighed and surveyed the empty room. Once filled with various absurd and hilarious artifacts, the room now held only a couch and coffee table in its center. The blonde stepped inside and frowned in confusion as he noted a purse lying atop the table.

"…Chad?"

Chad's breath caught in his throat as he looked up to see Sonny emerging from around the corner. Her eyes were a mixture of bewilderment and joy upon seeing him.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Same thing as you, I guess," Chad replied with a slight shrug. "Saying goodbye."

Sonny nodded mutely and gave a polite nod as Chad handed her the purse. The teenage girl slung the bag over her shoulder and sighed. A small smile twitched on the edge of Chad's lips.

"You're gonna miss the prop house aren't you?"

"I'm gonna miss everything about this show," she responded honestly. "I'm even going to miss Tawni, as strange as that sounds."

Chad lifted a shoulder in shrug. "But you two got to be pretty close over the last few years."

Sonny chuckled in recollection. "After she was sure that I wasn't trying to steal her spotlight, we did become pretty good friends."

There was an awkward silence that followed as the pair glanced around the empty room. Sonny thought it was amazing at how quiet everything seemed. Chad was just amazed that he would have one more chance to say goodbye to her. He didn't want to let go.

_Standing out in the rain  
Need to know if it's over  
Cause I will leave you alone._

_Flooded with all this pain  
Knowing that I'll never hold ya  
Like I did before the storm.  
_

After staring at her shoes for a silent minute, Sonny looked up and met Chad's eyes. "I'm leaving soon."

"Yeah," Chad's flat voice replied. "I know. You're going back to Wisconsin, right?"

Sonny nodded and opened her mouth to apparently say more. But something restrained her from doing so, and as she clamped her mouth shut, Chad noticed that tears were beginning to form in her eyes. His first instinct was to wrap his arms around her and pull her close. Taking a step toward her, he acted on impulse. Her eyes widened slightly and he halted. He took a step back.

More awkward silence followed.

"So…"

"So…"

The pair paused and Chad broke the silence by laughing. "We do this a lot whenever there's a really uncomfortable silence, don't we?"

Sonny cracked a smile. "Yes we do. And then our conversations usually end with our big fine versus good argument."

"…we argued a lot over the years."

"Oddly enough," Sonny replied, "it was something I actually looked forward to."

Chad smiled as he met her eyes. "Me too."

Seeming to struggle for the right words, the brunette nodded before slowly responding. "I'm going to miss…" Chad's intense blue eyes locked on hers, attempting to read her emotions. Sonny chickened out and hastily finished: "…L.A."

"So today is really our goodbye, Monroe?"

"This is it."

Chad seemed to think for a moment and extended his arm to Sonny. The young woman's furrowed eyebrows and puzzled expression indicated to Chad that he needed to explain himself further. "Let's take a walk," he insisted. Sonny eyed his arm. "Please," he added gently.

Sonny nodded and smiled slightly as she looped her arm with Chad's.

_With every strike of lightning  
Comes a memory that lasts  
And not a word is left unspoken  
As a thunder starts to crash  
Maybe I should give up_

As Chad and Sonny strolled down the empty hallways of Condor Studios, they couldn't help but be slightly stunned at how right it felt to be with each other at that moment. With their arms linked together, the pair walked mainly in silence as they passed hollow dressing rooms and vacant lots.

"Wait."

Chad paused as Sonny broke away from his arm. He followed her gaze and realized why she had chosen to stop – she was standing right in front of the dressing room she once shared with Tawni. The young woman pushed open the door and stepped into it, looking around with curiosity. Once all the furniture had been removed, the room looked surprisingly bigger. Sonny's chocolate eyes fell upon the ventilation system and she couldn't help but smile, expecting Zora to appear any moment. Sonny's smile diminished slowly and she remembered that she wouldn't be seeing Zora anymore. She'd have to get used to that.

Leaning up against the door frame with his arms folded in front of his chest stood Chad. He watched Sonny, and her painful reality was becoming his own. There would be no more barging unexpectedly onto each other's sets. There would be no one to pull pranks on, and no one to fight with. The shows that had defined each of them were over. Now they had to find new ways to define themselves.

Chad figured it was best that Sonny went back to Wisconsin. He knew that, as much as she loved L.A., her heart had always been there. His heart was in the star-packed city where the only lights you'd see at night were the ones flickering from high-rise apartment buildings and clubs. They were from two entirely different worlds. Opposites, he had always heard, attract. But what about polar opposites?

"Sonny," Chad began, as the brunette turned back toward the door, "are you looking forward to going home?"

"It's so strange to keep hearing it referred to as my home," she admitted. "I guess I've thought of this place as my home for so long."

Chad nodded thoughtfully and uncrossed his arms. "Understandable."

As Sonny exited the room, the pair began their slow walk toward the exit. "Are you going to miss _Mackenzie Falls_?" she asked.

Chad nodded and stuck his hands in his pocket. "Yeah, the show was my life for the past few years. People here became my family. Heck, I saw them more than I saw my actual family most weeks." The blonde waited a moment before continuing. "It's almost like when a show ends, you have to reinvent yourself. I'm not Mackenzie anymore. Wherever I go next, that will only be part of my past, not my future."

"But you're Chad Dylan Cooper," Sonny pressed. "You're not Mackenzie or whoever else you may play on television or in a movie in the future. At the end of the day, you're Chad."

Chad nodded and ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah, well sometimes, that's not enough for a lot of people. They want you to be everything."

"It's enough for me."

Chad looked over at Sonny, who had clearly not thought before uttering her statement. She was blushing. This made Chad grin and he nudged her gently with his elbow. The brunette threw a sideways glance at the actor and smiled.

_Standing out in the rain  
Need to know if it's over  
Cause I will leave you alone.  
Flooded with all this pain  
Knowing that I'll never hold ya  
Like I did before the storm._

"Did your mom just drop you off here?" Chad asked as the pair rounded a corner.

"More or less," the brunette responded. "She had to run and get some stuff last minute before we leave tonight."

"Driving or flying?"

"We're actually driving the minivan back with us."

Chad nodded and smiled. "That thing is still working?"

"Yes," Sonny replied with a laugh. "As hard as it is to believe, little Sylvia is still kicking."

Chad's eyebrows raised. "You named your minivan Sylvia? Why in the world would you do that?"

Sonny placed her hands on her hips and stopped in her walk to face Chad. "I will have you know," she remarked, wagging a finger at him, "that Sylvia is a very classy name. I think it suits her perfectly."

"Yeah, if she were an 80-year old woman in a rocking chair maybe."

Sonny swung her purse at Chad's arm and the latter let out an indignant "hey!" as it hit him. The young woman merely laughed and stuck her tongue out at her opponent. As the pair pushed open the exit, they groaned in unison. An afternoon thunderstorm had struck, and sheets of rain were currently pouring out of the charcoal gray sky.

Peering across the parking lot through the stormy weather, Sonny noticed that her minivan wasn't present. She pulled out her phone, texted a quick message to her mom, and then waited.

As Sonny texted, Chad swallowed and began to think of the best way to say goodbye. He would, after all, have only one shot.

_Trying to keep  
The light from going in  
And the clouds were ripping out my broken heart.  
They always say a heart is not a home  
Without the one who gets you through the storm._

"Thanks for sticking around Chad."

The blonde lifted a shoulder in a shrug. "It's not like I have rehearsal to get to or anything."

"You know," Sonny began slowly, "I have to thank you for all of the things you have done for me over the years."

Chad shook his head solemnly. "Sonny, you don't…"

"But I do," the brunette finished. Taking a deep breath, she rattled off her list. "Thank you for pretending to be my fan. Thank you for helping me get rid of James. Thank you for giving me your Lakers tickets. Thank you for letting us have our prop house back. Thank you for helping me break up Bitterman and Marshall. Thank you for being my one special dance at prom. Thank you for everything I have failed to thank you for up until now."

Chad met Sonny's genuine gaze and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I don't deserve thank you's," he insisted. "You do."

"But I…"

Chad pressed his finger to Sonny's lips, much like he had done the first week they met. Once Sonny was silent, he smiled sadly and sighed. "Thank you for being the most annoyingly bubbly and optimistic person I have ever met. Thank you for standing up to me when I was a jerk. Thank you for caring about others more than you do about yourself. Thank you for being the most amazing girl I have ever met."

Sonny's eyes welled up with tears as the loud roar of thunder outside began to draw closer. The rain was now picking up speed, falling heavier by the minute. When Chad took her hand in his, she was sure that she would break.

"Chad, I…can't. I can't do this."

Wrenching her hand from Chad's, Sonny sprinted out the doors into the torrential rain. He could see, quite clearly despite the rain, that a pale-colored minivan was pulling onto the lot. Within a few moments, she would be gone. And he couldn't let that happen quite yet. He had one regret left.

_Standing out in the rain  
Knowing that it's really over  
Please don't leave me alone_.

"Sonny, wait!"

Lightning flashed close by, and Chad knew it was potentially life-threatening to be outside in such a storm. But he couldn't let Sonny drive away from his life until he told her.

Sonny turned around slowly, dark t-shirt sticking to her body. Her hair was matted onto her face and she was dripping wet under the waterfall of rain still cascading from the sky. His hair was a mess, he knew, but he didn't care. He stood, fifteen feet from where she was, desperate to close the distance. But he knew that if he moved closer, she would run toward the van and his chance would be gone. Instead, she stood, rooted to the drenched asphalt beneath her feet. She was clenching her fists, but the rest of her body was surprisingly relaxed.

"I love you."

He didn't yell his profession. He projected it loud enough for her to hear over the rain without yelling boisterously. Her eyes widened briefly and the tears, or the rain, for he could barely tell the difference, streamed down her face. But she never lost eye contact with him.

The minivan pulled up beside her, and she stared at him for a moment longer before throwing open the door. He stood, watched her shut the door and then continued to watch as the van pulled out from the parking lot and into the streets of L.A., bound for Wisconsin.

Only then did Chad realize that the moisture on his face was not rain.

_I'm flooded with all this pain  
Knowing that I'll never hold ya  
Like I did before the storm._

* * *

**I'm sorry it was so depressing. I promise that the next thing I write will be something very fluffy to make up for it. This duet though has been stuck in my head for days and I thought that it needed to be written. I also thought I read somewhere on here that there was a songfic challenge going around, so that kind of inspired this piece.**

**Again, thank you all for reading and I hope you review and read in the future!**


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